Thursday, July 31, 2008

Morning!

I type "Morning!" in the header, which I feel gives off a rather happy and upbeat mood. I'm not happy or upbeat. I'm tired and I guess sort of bored.

I feel like I should stop writing these things in the morning, but it is perhaps the only time I feel like typing and thinking. Since it's the begining of the day I feel like I might not have as much to say as I would later in the day. But I'm sure I can muster something up!

Doe is almost done with school, I'm not sure what she's going to do after that but I just hope she is happy. Unfortunately, she seemed down lately about everything. To be completely honest, I can't help her. I try to help her but I guess I'm just not good with that sort of thing. I always feel like I'm doing something nice or considerate, but it just turns out to make her upset I suppose. I think in hinds sight everything I do is selfish anyways. I can't bring up a good example but I've come to realize I'm a crummy husband. But I've really been trying to better myself as a husband, at least I think I have. I've been going to bed earlier, I've lessened my time hanging with my friends, supporting Doe in whatever she feels like pursuing.

Going to bed Earlier:
To elaborate, I mean I'm not staying up until three playing video games or doing stupid crap online. I'm going to bed with her, rather then next to her. This is beneficial for me I suppose, although I still can't wake up comfortably at 7:30am even if I get to bed at 10:00pm.

Lessening Time Hanging with Friends:
This one may sound sort of bad I guess. It's not like I haven't stop seeing my friends, I just don't spend time hanging out in a basement with them every night until three anymore. Is it a sign of a bad husband to be out every night and letting his wife go to bed alone. I suppose it is. I guess this one needs more thought.

Supporting Doe:
This one is self explanatory. If Doe wants to go hang out with her friends and get a tattoo, I want her to do this. If she wants to go work for whoever, I just try to help her accomplish getting that job I guess. Since she's been in school she hasn't had much time for a job besides babysitting. And even if I don't like the friends she's decided to go hang out with I think she needs to hang out with them. I guess I feel like she doesn't do anything fun all that much. She doesn't have much of a choice. She needs to wake up, go to school, come home and repeat. On the weekends she's restricted because she doesn't have a car and I hate doing anything fun I suppose. So whenever she comes up with plans I just want her to do that.



Switching topics:

I've started listening to this band "The Bird and The Bee". They're sort of an indie/alternative two man band.

There's a women who plays bass and does vocals who I find attractive for some reason. She has this thing about her that makes me want to love her, ha. She's very 70's themed as you can see.
The other member is a man who plays the keyboard. He's a regular man.


I found them on youtube off of Eric Wareheim's page. He directed their video wonderfully and ever since then I've fallen in love with their music. The Polite Dance Song being number one on my list.

They're coming around in September and I'm going to see them, I suppose even if it's alone.

It's good to go to a show where you don't have to worry about assholes running around purposely hitting other people. It brings me to the "Hardcore Scene" or I guess "The Scene". It's high school. It's pityful. As embarrassing as it is, I was once concerned with the status I had with any of the more popular Scene idols. Which is rediculous because they're nothing more then kids who go to hardcore shows act like assholes. They're far more insignificant in the world then I feel I am. (But I guess I'm being a hipocrite because I'm sure there are people out there who think I'm insignificant because my lack of a serious career, and I hate them for it) Oh well. My point is, these people at the head of the scene are like big babies. One wrong move with them and they're bad mouthing you, spreading rumors about you to all the other stupid kids who'll listen to him/her because they're popular. I don't know, after typing that sentence I feel like it's doesn't carry the meaning I thought it would. I'm right now coming to realize the whole world is this high school drama where popularity is how one needs to survive. Oh it's a truth.

Perhaps I'm bitter because I don't have the charisma that I wish I had. Nah, it's cool.

I had two jello cups and two half frozen waffles for breakfast. The waffles hurt my teeth because they were so cold!


Anyways!

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